How To Win Friends And Influence People

by DaleCarnegie

from http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?HowToWinFriendsAndInfluencePeople

 

One of the most important and influential works on effective communication skills. Despite the title (it was originally written in the 1930s), it teaches honest and simple techniques for getting along with other people, not deception and scheming. A must for anyone who wants to advance in their career.

The summary below is intended as a summary only. Remember, this book was written originally in the 1930s, and some of it may appear to be condescending on the surface, simply because times change. However, the book's genuineness shines through when you read it.

This is Dale Carnegie's summary of his book, from 1936

Part One

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

  1. DontCriticizeCondemnOrComplain.
  2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
  3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Part Two

Six ways to make people like you

  1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
  2. Smile.
  3. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
  4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
  5. Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
  6. Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely.

Part Three

Win people to your way of thinking

  1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
  2. Show respect for the other person's opinions. Never say, "You're wrong."
  3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
  4. Begin in a friendly way.
  5. Get the other person saying "yes, yes" immediately.
  6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
  7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
  8. Try honestly to see things from the other person's point of view.
  9. Be sympathetic with the other person's ideas and desires.
  10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
  11. Dramatize your ideas.
  12. Throw down a challenge.

Part Four

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

A leader's job often includes changing your people's attitudes and behavior. Some suggestions to accomplish this:

  1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
  2. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
  3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
  5. Let the other person save face.
  6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be "hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
  7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
  9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

 

Go to: Popularity test: male or female

Go to: Home page

Comments to: VanSloan@yahoo.com
Google
 
Web SQ.4mg.com (this website, 170+ pages on IQ and Success skills)

The ads below are placed by Google.com - they are not necessarily endorsed by this site